Troubled Teens Resources

When something becomes commonplace, does it all of a sudden become harmless? It is amazing how often you will read that phrase “it’s become common” - about teen drug abuse, drinking, and sex. And it is said as if to say, “Oh well, cats out of the bag now. Nothing we can do.”

And perhaps that is why there will always be a need for schools for troubled teens. As long as parents and teachers and the culture see the outrageous as common, and therefore acceptable, self-destructive behavior will continue to escalate, in all of it’s many manifestations.

Sorry to rant but this article on self-mutilation has, seemingly, the same attitude.

“The self-injury club for teens is not all that exclusive. Joining can almost seem trendy.

“There’s an incredible amount of kids who deal with these issues,” says a 16-year-old high school junior who knows all about membership.

“Cutting is definitely the most popular. I did some of that, but that wasn’t my preference,” she explains. Instead, she usually engaged in bruising herself, sometimes banging her wrist against hard objects. Or, she scraped herself. She says she no longer hurts herself.
[…]
Exactly how much self-injury has increased is not known, but most researchers believe it has grown, along with a kind of acceptance.

“It does seem like it’s something that people don’t frown on quite as much,” says Lloyd-Richardson. Since her report was published, she has heard from many young adults who said cutting was common in their high schools.”
(source)

Teens at risk for self destructive behavior, such as teen age drug abuse or indiscriminate sex, stand to benefit by a new test called the adolescent risk inventory (ARI). Experts purport that this verbal assessment will reveal indicators that the tested teen is vulnerable for, or tends to, risky behavior.

“Researchers studied 134 youth ages 12 to 19 with psychiatric disorders. Each study participant was given the adolescent risk inventory (ARI) (a paper and pencil measure). The ARI included questions about sexual history (have you ever been pregnant or been a dad?), self-harm (have you ever attempted suicide?), and attitudes towards acting out (do you break rules for no reason?).
“We found that the ARI is reliable and comprehensive and can be useful in quickly identifying a wide range of teen risk behaviors,” says Lescano.”
(source)

The intent is for the family doctor to administer these tests as part of the teens medical assessment so that if any concerns are raised that the teen can be referred to a program that could serve as a preemptive measure against trouble down the road.

It is something that will have to be closely watched. Do schools have access to these results? Though the questions seem straight forward, the answers still require an evaluative process. What criteria is used to judge responses? Can such materials be used against a teen in juvenile court? Just like any tool for possible good, the negative aspects have to be considered as well.

Parents will want to look at such an assessment in light of their possible misuse, misinterpretation or intrusion into a family’s privacy. If parents are satisfied that the assessment will be handled in a constructive way, parents can make requests for the test to their family physician, if available.

A parent who has a teen diagnosed with ADD faces the difficult decision of whether to use medication or attempt to find a program designed to teach their teen how to work with their ADD and learn the necessary coping skills needed to mange ADD. It is often a more appealing resolution to give the teen the power to manage his own emotions and temperament than to give that responsibility over to a drug.

Find a Summer Program for Add Teen

Because ADD typically causes behavioral problems which can lead to agitation, insecurity and depression, an ADD teen is more vulnerable to self-destructive behavior. Without treatment, ADD can precipitate a downward spiral that ultimately can be very damaging.

Parents may want to consider finding a summer program conducted by a troubled teen boarding school or wilderness camp that will specifically focus on ADD. Some troubled teen boarding schools offer summer boot camp programs for non-resident teens specifically focused on learning cognitive and critical thinking skills that equip a teen to manage his ADD. Check with your mental health professionals to see if there is a summer program for your teen.

Here is a quick review of symptoms displayed by ADD kids;

Add Symptoms

• Inability to follow instructions, failing to complete schoolwork or requiring an excessive amount of time to finish homework
• Easily distractible, forgetting daily activities
• Failure to focus, failure to pay attention to someone speaking
• Some examples of impulsivity include:
• A child who interrupts or blurts out answers before a question is finished.
• Trouble waiting for ones turn.
• Acting or speaking without thinking of the consequences or dangers.
• Some examples of hyperactivity include:
• Inability to sit in ones seat with constant fidgeting of hands and feet.
• Running and climbing at inappropriate times.
• Children who talk excessively.
• A child who is on the go constantly.
• Some examples of poor organizational skills include:
• Failure to bring home assignments or to turn assignments into the teacher on a timely basis.
• Inability to follow instructions or be able to plan success strategies such as when to study for a test, or how to organize papers and folders.
• Difficulty remembering to bring home books etc.

(source)

Your teenager has made it all the way to college and you hope that he will survive the typically tempestuous first two years. If he succeeds in resisting the vortex of teenage binge drinking, he will be well on his way to graduation. Recent studies indicate a college student’s tendency to “party hearty” diminishes as he progresses through school.

Another campus based study indicates a promising means of intervention in combatting binge drinking.
Dubbed “motivational interviewing”, it has the at-risk teenager examine the discrepancy between self-destructive behavior and their stated goals.

“They used the motivational interviewing technique with students in the university’s Freshman Seminar program. During two 75-minute class sessions, they talked with students about their goals and values and helped the students recognize discrepancies between their current behavior and their values.

A total of 91 freshmen participated in the study. Of that number 47 were in MI group prevention classes while 44 were in a control group.

“We didn’t think that this type of intervention would be terribly potent in a group format,” Michael said. “We were surprised to find that students who had the intervention consumed fewer drinks and became intoxicated less often than the control group.”

Students who previously had reported getting drunk four to five times a month reported 1.5 fewer episodes of intoxication in a 30- to 45-day period following the MI sessions. They also reported consuming 4.5 fewer drinks during that period.”
(source)

Many crisis intervention programs for binge drinking or drug abuse are local in scope and perhaps not well publicized. If you have a teenager in college, inquire on campus as to what programs might be in place. Check also with the counties and municipalities for possible intervention programs. A little research can go a long way.

“Hi every1. I haven’t been happy in a very long time. I have been crying and feeling very lonely. I miss my old school and don’t have a lot of friends. I realli hate my stupid fuckin life. I just saw my therapist and lately I have been crying at the end of my therapy appointments. My parents want me to try an after-school activity but I’m scared about dat cuz I ain’t good at meeting new ppl. I’m worried kids might make fun of me cuz I have Asperger’s Syndrome. I need to make friends and feel better soon or else my parents will send me to boarding school next year and I don’t want dat! What should I do? sum1 plz help”
(source)

“…very lonely…miss old school…ain’t good at meeting new people…or else my parents will send me to boarding school.”

Loneliness, a sense of not belonging, fear of new people, fear of being misunderstood; all factors that could easily lead this troubled teen to abusing drugs or other self-destructive behavior.

A military school or placement into a teen therapy program at an accredited boarding school is the very plan of action that could save this at-risk teen from losing their life all together. Yet, it sounds as if the parents have perhaps used the idea of a boarding school as a threat as opposed to discussing it with their troubled teen as a positive solution for her loneliness and sense of ostracism.

It is very important that parents of troubled teens not resort to presenting a boarding school solution as a threat or punishment. For a trouble teen with this combination of emotional disturbances, it is the exact environment where she or he can safely work out their problems, safe from the lure of drugs or other destructive means of escaping emotional pain.

A good boarding school will be able to address all of a troubled teen’s issues, providing he or she with excellent coping skills, assisting the troubled teen in developing their talents and strengths, teaching them healthy methods of dealing with depression and loneliness. Unfortunately, the solutions teens may seek outside of an effective teen treatment program and without the protective isolation a good boarding school are all too often found in drugs or alcohol abuse. In a sound teen treatment program in an accredited boarding school, the at-risk teen is given an even playing field to heal, not subject to the additional pressure of being tempted to use drugs or alcohol as a means of coping.

A parent who is considering sending their troubled teen to a brat camp or boarding school would be well advised to present such a solution in a positive light, not as a threat, but as an empowering opportunity for growth.

One of the most painful things for Karen to remember was her mother’s inability to forgive herself for the troubles that Karen went though as a teenager. “I tried so hard to convince her that I forgave her - that the most important thing is that she loved me and that she did all that she knew how to do. But I couldn’t convince her and she died never forgiving herself for how she raised me.”

There was very little in the way of teen crisis intervention for parents in the sixties and seventies. There wasn’t a “Just Say No’ campaign, no D.A.R.E type community efforts, no teen treatment programs. Just the horror of seeing your beloved teenager succumb to drug addiction and self-destruction. “I put my mother through crisis after crisis,” Karen mused, “and there wasn’t anything but prayer for my mother to turn to.”

Karen’s story emphasizes how important it is for a parent today not to take on the guilt of their teenager’s addictions or at-risk behavior.

“As I look back, there are many things that I would have done differently had I known differently. But I didn’t know. I did the best I could, given my then current level of knowledge and then current level of inner healing.

This is what is true for must of us as parents - we did the best we could, given our level of knowledge and healing at that time. It is, therefore, inappropriate to judge ourselves or be available to being judged by our children. It is certainly appropriate to acknowledge our shortcomings, but it is not appropriate to allow our children to blame us for their current problems.”
(Source)

Guilt can cripple the parent’s authority by providing a teenager a handy scapegoat and another excuse. Even if a parent has legitimate grounds to blame themselves for their teenager’s self-destructive behavior, it does not negate the teenager’s need to take responsibility for their own actions.