Troubled Teens Resources

Anger management is obviously not solely a teen issue. But learning how to control anger definitely ought to be. Sorting out conflicting emotions and the ability to debate points of contention are extremely valuable skills that, frankly, most adults need to improve upon.

Teen crisis intervention is always best delivered by teaching these very types of coping skills.
If you have a passionate teen who is not able to rein in his emotions when confronted or contradicted, MyOutofControlTeen.com has materials and resources parents can use in teaching their teens how to handle combustible situations and difficult people. One method suggested is teaching the teen basic conflict resolution.

Some suggestions are:

1. Setting ground rules. Agree to work together and set rules such as noname-calling, blaming, yelling or interrupting.
2. Listening. Let each person describe their point of view without interruption. The point is to understand what a person wants and why they want it.
3. Finding common interests. Establish facts and issues that everyone can agree on and determine what is important to each person.
4. Brainstorming possible solutions to the problem. List all options without judging them or feeling that they must be carried out. Try to think of solutions where everyone gains something.
5. Discussing each person’s view of the proposed solutions. Negotiate and try to reach a compromise that is acceptable to everyone involved.
6. Reaching an agreement. Each person should state his or her
7. interpretation of the agreement. Try writing the agreement down and checking back at a later time to see how it is working.

“Can you tell you have depression without diagnosis? I can’t even begin to explain things in my life. I’m so stessed, from everything. In the back of my mind, even though I’m not actually thinking of killing myself or anything, I really honestly always, even when I’m happy, believe that I would be better off dead. It’s not unhappiness as much as it’s a wish to rather not be living. I mean, idk. I can be having the best time of my life, and I still wish I wasn’t alive, and I’d wish I didn’t have to go through it, because I have it in my head that it’ll eventually get worse, because it ALWAYS does. It’s where you come to this realization that you’ve worked so hard to get through so many bad things that have already happened in your life, and you just want it to be over and you want there to be happiness and you don’t want to have to worry for the rest of your life, but I know this is only the beginning, because I’m a teenager. I don’t want to go on. I really just wanna die and get it over with and idk how to deal with it. What do I do?”
(source)

This from a depressed teenager reaching out to other teens on a message board. If you take the time to read various teen boards, you will find that these type of inquiries, unfortunately, are not unusual.

Studies indicate there is typically a constellation of factors that will push a teen into a suicidal crisis. Interestingly enough, even though the internet has spawned such sites as Myspace and other virtual venues for communication, technology has been seen as an additional factor in a troubled teen’s sense of isolation and loneliness.

Combine that with the unrealistic images of the fabulous lives enjoyed by celebrity teens and movies celebrating out of control teenagers wrecking havoc with little consequences, the teens sense of unreality and marginalization increases.

Teenagers may commiserate with each other, assured of anonymity, on a teen board, but they are unlikely to approach an adult for comfort. It is the responsibility of the parent or teacher to recognize the signs of teen depression and devise an intervention.

Here is a partial summary of risk factors inherent in a possible suicidal teenager:

• Previous suicide attempts - If a youth has attempted suicide in the past, he or she is much more likely than other youths to attempt suicide again in the future. If a male teen has attempted suicide in the past, he is more than thirty times more likely to complete suicide, while a female with a past attempt has about three times the risk. Approximately a third of teenage suicide victims have made a previous suicide attempt.18
• Mental disorders or co-occurring mental and alcohol or substance abuse disorders - Research shows that over 90% of young people who complete suicide have a diagnosable mental or substance abuse disorder or both, and that the majority have depressive illness.19 In a 10- to 15-year followup study of 73 adolescents diagnosed with major depression, 7 percent of the adolescents had completed suicide sometime later. The depressed adolescents were five times more likely to have attempted suicide as well, compared with a control group of age peers without depression.20 Almost half of teenagers who complete suicide have had a previous contact with a mental health professional. In addition, aggressive, disruptive, and impulsive behavior is common in youth of both sexes who complete suicide.21
• Family history of suicide22 - A high proportion of suicides and attempters have had a close family member (sibling, parent, aunt, uncle, or grandparent) who attempted or completed suicide. Familial suicide can be a function of imitation or genetics. Many of the mental illnesses which contribute to suicide risk appear to have a genetic component.
• Stressful life event or loss - Stressful life events often precede a suicide and/or suicide attempt. Such stressful life events include getting into trouble at school or with a law enforcement agency; fighting or breaking up with a boyfriend or a girlfriend; and fighting with friends. They are rarely a sufficient cause of suicide, but they often act as precipitating factors in young people.23, 24
• Easy access to lethal methods, especially guns - As mentioned above, firearms are the most common method of suicide by youth. The most common location for the occurrence of firearm suicides by youth is in their homes, and there is a positive association between the accessibility and availability of firearms in the home and the risk for youth suicide. The risk conferred by guns in the home is proportional to the accessibility (e.g., loaded and unsecured firearms) and the number of guns in the home.25, 26
• Exposure to the suicidal behavior of others, whether that of a peer or in the media 27 - Suicide can be facilitated in vulnerable teens by exposure to real or fictional accounts of suicide, including media coverage of suicide, such as intensive reporting of the suicide of a celebrity, or the fictional representation of a suicide in a popular movie or TV show. In addition, there is evidence of suicide clusters, that is, local epidemics of suicide that have a contagious influence. Suicide clusters nearly always involve previously disturbed young people who knew about each other’s death but rarely knew the other victims personally.
• Incarceration28 - Although there are insufficient national data regarding the incidence of youth suicide in custody, information suggests a high prevalence of suicidal behavior in juvenile correctional facilities. One study found that suicide in juvenile detention and correctional facilities was more than four times greater than youth suicide overall. According to another recent study, more than 11,000 juveniles engage in more than 17,000 incidents of suicidal behavior in juvenile facilities each year.

(Source)

Also see Mental Health Sanctuary’s list of suicide hot lines and online communication resources. Crisis intervention includes being prepared before the crisis, in hopes of ultimately preventing one.

“Sara allowed A&E to film her struggle with her methamphetamine addiction. Despite her pleading parents, Sara refused to seek meth treatment to help with her problem. Although she was a meth addict who had temporarily lost custody of her daughter, the negative effects of meth weren’t enough to stop her. When Sara’s parents noticed the signs of meth use in their house, they knew they had to take action. They held an intervention and convinced Sara that her methamphetamine addiction was out of control, and she finally accepted meth treatment.”
Sara’s Story

“They held an intervention…” What exactly does that look like? For the parent of a troubled teen, intervention can seem a rather intimidating concept and an overwhelming undertaking. Yet,things between you and your teen are deteriorating rapidly, past civility, past reasonable discussions. Now it is either silence or ugly words spit in anger. It may be wise to review what holding an intervention entails.

If submitting your teen’s crisis to A&E’s Intervention has been eliminated as an option, you need to consider whether a formal or informal intervention is appropriate at this stage for your teen..

The following two sites examine both options.

“Intervention does not have to be a formal confrontation of the afflicted person by a group of people. It can be any number of triggers that add up to move a person along a continuum toward help-seeking and wellness. A conversation can be a powerful tool.”
Ten Points for Parents to Intervene With Their Kids

A formal intervention means having a structured conversation with the person. This involves bringing
together a group of people with the substance user to explore how his or her use has affected all their
lives. The formal intervention is usually used when the person has repeatedly refused to get help.
Intervention Quick Guide